ALESSIA FARNESI: Luxury Fashion Stylist

From fantasising about falling down the Nine West staircase just to escape another nightmare shift to teaching the next generation of fashion talent at London College of Fashion, Alessia's journey to styling business founder has been a wild ride. Born with an instinctive understanding of how clothes should work together, Alessia appointed herself as wardrobe director for family games at a young age, insisting quite rightly that even pretend princesses needed properly coordinated costumes. That early instinct would carry her through the fashion industry's most unlikely corridors – rickety retail staircases, finance firm cubicles, luxury flash sales startups - before she finally landed where she belongs: creating transformative "mirror moments" for high powered men and women clients who discover, with her styling guidance, they can actually like what they see.

I first met Alessia at a VIP stylist dinner through MATCHES when she was working as one of our top freelance styling partners. She has this magnetic presence - effortlessly glamorous but completely down-to-earth, with a wicked sense of humour that makes you feel like you've known each other for years, even after just five minutes of conversation.

The staircase from hell

Alessia's fashion education began at Nine West in Covent Garden when she was 16, in what she describes as retail torture. Their aggressive sales approach required staff to present three shoe alternatives and three matching bags for every single customer request, all while navigating a staircase barely wide enough for one person carrying armfuls of boots. The whole setup was a nightmare, trying to lug knee-high boots up and down those narrow stairs during busy weekend shifts.

"Hideous!" she laughs, recalling those early days when she used to fantasise about minor injuries just to avoid another Saturday shift.

The next few years brought along a few seemingly disconnected jobs, including a particularly surreal period inputting foreign exchange rates at a private pensions firm but they all had a common thread. Colleagues kept insisting Alessia was wasting her morning outfit efforts in finance, and had all been asking her for styling advice for dates and nights out via email. She'd spend time creating complete looks with ASOS links, putting together blue looks, pink looks, whatever they needed.

The flash sale revolution

Everything clicked when Alessia joined Cocosa, a luxury flash sales website. Within a week, she was proposing new ideas that would revolutionise how they presented stock to customers. Instead of the usual approach of organising by brands, her breakthrough idea was super simple but elegant: create themed boutiques by styling pieces from different collections together, such as a beach capsule featuring bikinis, beach bags, hats and cover up across multiple brands.

"I was basically making outfits in rows of four - dress, shoe, jacket, bag. I was just doing what made perfect sense to me. If you want to sell these dresses, people need to see how they would wear it."

The concept was commercially huge and had an amazing ripple effect - customers would discover brands they'd never considered because they saw them styled with pieces they already loved. This was more than visual merchandising, Alessia was styling at scale, and it worked brilliantly. The instinct had been there for years.

The COVID reality check

When the pandemic hit, Alessia faced her darkest professional period. As a relatively new business owner, she wasn't eligible for government support, and her styling work evaporated overnight. The financial reality was brutal - her partner at the time became their only source of income, and some established contacts abandoned her without warning, citing uncertainty about the future.

During those dark months, maintaining routine became her lifeline. She created structure around live Pilates classes at 9am, forcing herself to get dressed and move, then taking walks while listening to podcasts. Those podcasts became crucial, connecting her to the fashion world when everything else felt uncertain.

"I listened to old ones and new ones, ones with founders and people in fashion, and it just kept me so excited. I just knew I was in the right place. If it's not a hell yes, it's a hell no. And it was always a hell yes."

The Wardrobe Archaeologist

Today, Alessia has built her practice around what she calls "shopping your own wardrobe." She begins every client relationship by digging out treasures from what they already own, an approach that delivers immediate impact while establishing crucial trust. It's detective work that often yields surprising discoveries, like clients with 25 nearly identical white shirts or trousers, or huge wardrobes where hardly anything gets worn.

"A wardrobe is like a window into that person. It stops me from buying something they've already got, or suggesting floral prints when their whole wardrobe is black and white. We've all done that thing where you open your wardrobe, it's full of clothes, but you've got nothing to wear. I just know there's always a gem."

The approach works because clients are stunned when Alessia pulls together countless new outfits from pieces they'd forgotten they owned.

"It gives them confidence that I'm not there just to spend their money. I'm there for the looks. And also it hurts me physically to see beautiful things not be worn! Pieces from incredible past collections just sitting there."

The Transformation Moment

For Alessia, everything centres on what she calls the "mirror moment" - that instant when a client's entire energy shifts. She experienced it powerfully with one of her first major clients, someone who's remained with her since 2018 and became the foundation of her business through referrals.

During their second session, the client looked in the mirror and said simply, "I like me now." The physical transformation was unmistakable - shoulders relaxing, standing taller, looking proud.

"There's this moment when someone gets it. When I see that, I know we're good."

The ripple effects were extraordinary. The client's transformation was so dramatic that people assumed she'd had plastic surgery.

"She just blossomed from this whole experience because she felt so good in what she was wearing. Everyone was suddenly asking her, 'Oh my God, what's happened to you?'"

This single client's transformation generated the multiple referrals that built Alessia's entire business.

Numbers Don't Lie

Alessia's background across different fashion sectors gives her something many newer stylists lack: commercial credibility. She understands profit margins, recognises quality fabrics, and can instantly assess whether something justifies its price point. This knowledge proves invaluable when guiding investment decisions, like when a male client saw a £3000 jacket from a big name luxury brand that just wasn't worth it compared to a beautifully made suit from a premium brand at the same price.

"Having that retail and finance background, you learn a respect for the commerciality of it. You understand return rates and things - you're more mindful”

Setting the record straight about styling

Alessia has strong opinions about the industry's confusion between personal styling and personal shopping - roles requiring completely different expertise. She's particularly frustrated by social media "stylists" who are essentially influencers dressing only themselves.

"Personal shoppers and personal stylists are two different things. A shopper's forte is having their fingers on the pulse with key items and really good connections to source things. Stylists are creating incredible looks, making you feel your best."

To Alessia, true styling means working with different bodies, personalities, and lifestyles and having worked closely with Personal Shopping teams for nearly a decade myself, I have to agree.

"You can be incredibly skilled at wearing fashion for yourself, but translating that to what that means on another body, on a real person - it's all different."

From Student to Teacher

Last year brought an unexpected career addition when London College of Fashion approached Alessia to teach. It happened through a completely organic conversation at lunch about a Margiela show that had captivated her. One minute she was chatting passionately about Gwendoline Christie’s entrance at the Spring 24 couture show and  how fashion isn't static, but what we wear is like the dance of life itself, and the next she was being offered an opportunity to teach students!

The experience has been revelatory, especially witnessing emerging talent at the recent CSM graduate show. She spotted a student called Rose whose collection was so stunning it could have been Bottega or Jacquemus - woven pieces, dresses, bags and hats that were incredible.

"I made notes of her name like, 'you are next!'"

My Take

I love that Alessia is full of fascinating contradictions. She can arrive at a fashion event wearing an incredible Alaïa jacket looking super chic, then immediately launch into hilarious stories about toddler chaos at home. There's no pretence with her, and she's completely open about the messy reality alongside the glamour, which I find incredibly refreshing. It's also what makes her so magnetic. Alessia is one of the cool girls, but she invites everyone to sit with her.

I'm a huge advocate for life experience over university credentials, so watching Alessia's journey from industry outsider to teaching at London College of Fashion feels particularly meaningful. She's earned her place through pure expertise and hard work, and those students are incredibly lucky to learn from someone who's lived every aspect of the business.

But honestly, the Nine West nightmare story sealed it for me. We all have these retail horror stories - my two best friends and I still laugh about our own part-time job at Thorntons chocolate shop during Easter, running up and down a similarly nightmarish staircase all day carrying piles of chocolate eggs. There's something about surviving those early career disasters (and finding the humour in them, as Alessia does!) that creates the fuel and resilience for building something better.

All of this - the empathy, the commercial knowledge, the fun, the personality and the genuine care - comes together in her styling practice today. If you're looking for someone who'll transform not just your wardrobe but how you see yourself in the mirror, Alessia is your girl.

You'll have to snap her up though. Unsurprisingly, she's in high demand.

Follow Alessia's journey on Instagram @alessiafarnesi where she shares glimpses into both her personal and styling world.

About the author: Pippa Mellor is an ILM L7 Executive Coach and Personal Shopping Consultant whose services include 1:1 fashion career coaching and helping luxury and premium brands to increase revenue and VIP client loyalty by building strategic personal shopping programmes.